Depressive day today...

Not sure why, but my moods have been all over the shot the last few days :( One minute I'm fine, the next I'm close to tears. Cant seem to stop it! I've been taking my anti-depressants so I shouldn't be like this. But hey.

My parents were supposed to be coming to see me today. However, they got halfway here and I got a phone call from my mum who was close to tears. Apparently their car had just lost their brakes and so they were having to turn around and go back home. However, they weren't just coming to see me for the heck of it. My Dad has recently qualified as a Dr and he has to pass something called an ALS course. He failed the first attempt and has to go to Northampton for the second attempt which is at 8:30am tomorrow morning. I hope they manage to get them fixed so they can come see me and get my dad to his exam. But yeah. I got really scared when my mum rang me.

Anyways, I'm gonna go now. I feel better now I've vented a bit. Hoping they still get to come up. Hopefully my little brother and sister will get to stay with me while my mum and dad go up to the Midlands. But we shall see. Going into town to get some pebbles for a vase that Ben bought me :-)

xxx

Up date and a lil' bit of history...

Well, Ben has just left for his 1st written exam :S He had a fibres test practical thing last week which he forgot to take his notes to (twit) but he managed to do pretty well in it anyway and passed :D


So yeah, I'm now sitting in bed, waiting for my pain killers to kick in so that my head and neck will stop hurting like a bitch! My head hurts, my neck hurts, my throat hurts, I feel nauseous, and I feel dizzy :'( So I really am feeling like a piece of poo today!


Everything is irritating me today:

• The fact that it is taking me 3 or 4 attempts to send each damn text message from my phone and about 3 minutes to connect if I try and ring someone.

• The fact that I'm hungry but the thought of food makes me feel ill. 

• The fact that my pain killers are yet to kick in and stop my head and neck hurting.

• Every time I cough it nearly splits my head in 2.

• I want to take Ben out to dinner, but I also told him I'd buy him Skate 3 and wont have enough money to do both.

• The fact that I cant get comfortable. 

• That fact that my laptop keeps deciding to do its own thing. For example, last night, i put it to sleep but it decided to wake itself up about 2 hours later and then constantly hum while it did stuff I didn't want it to do.

• The fact that I have just spent half an hour playing a game on Facebook (Hotel City) for it to then crash and loose everything I had just done and paid for. Now, this wouldn't be so bad, if I had got all the items back - or at least all the money I'd spent. But no, it took both. And then it decided it wasn't going to let me close the frigging page and so I had to ctrl alt delete that bitch!

• the fact that I really want a car. And I really want to be able to drive legally. But no. Cant do either because of no money. 

I'm feeling annoyingly depressed today. Now, I have suffered from depression for about 6 years now, so I'm used to that. But I have also been on tablets for most of those years and I always thought that when on the medication, I'd be normal. But no. I hate going up and down and up and down all the time! One minute I can be perfectly happy then then next I will either want to kill myself or someone near to me (which is usually Ben - how he puts up with me I do not know. I guess it really is love) Yesterday I was fine, and this morningn I felt ok. But now I've nose dived. And I always do it when im on my own. which sucks. Wish Ben was here. He would give me a hug and tell me that everything will be alright and he'd make me smile. He always does that. He can make me smile, even when I'm so pissed at him its unreal. drives me up the wall. I'm beginnging to be able to do it to him to. But hes better at hiding it then me. I just start grinning whereas he can slyly turn his head so I cant see him and still think he's pissed at me! Haha.

Im going to have to cut this one short, my parents are on their way to see me :D

xxx

Ohhhhh, chocolate!!!

Right, so my mum and dad bought me loads of relaxation/bath things for Christmas. Candles, face masks, body scrubs, foot scrubs etc. While Ben is in our living room studying with some friends I thought, "I know, I'll use one of the face masks my mum got me" One of them was chocolate and one was strawberry. I obviously went for the chocolate one. Before I opened it I thought it was just going to smell like chocolate. But no. It looks, smells and feels like melted chocolate!! And it warms up!! Insane. I am having to try extremely hard to not lick my face!! Haha.It was a very bizarre feeling spreading what felt like melted chocolate onto my face and not pouring into my mouth :S And that is why I'm fat! Lol.


On another, not so funny, note. My flatmate bought a girl home last night. Now, he's had a girl in his room allllll weekend that he is "seeing". However, he didn't want me or my boyfriend to even see her! Well, they left the flat at 6:30am yesterday morning and then at about 10/11pm last night he came home... with what sounded like a different girl!! Well, I think it was a different girl. If it wasn't then the original one is a complete dumb fuck as she didn't know which was his room and she'd been in it all weekend. Lol. But yeah, I digress. I thought, "Oh perhaps he's tattooing her. Although its very late to start doing that..." Oh how naive I am!! About 20 minutes later I heard the unmistakeable *squeak, squeak, squeak* of my spare bed. I was sat there trying to watch "The Full Monty" while all I could hear was *squeak, squeak, squeak*. Although I do have to give him credit, where credit is due. He was going for pretty much the entire film!! But yeah. I have never felt that uncomfortable in my life!! Well, actually I lie. I overheard my dad and step-mum while we were on holiday in Corfu once. That was embarrassing! Think the entire villa complex heard!! And then my brother asked if was me!!! :S


Anyways, I'm gonna have to go wash this face mask off now before I start licking it, and I'm not sure that would be a good idea as I don't actually recognize any of the ingredients so I'm guessing what I currently have smeared all over my face is not actually chocolate XD


Bye all!!
xx

Still feeling like shit

Sooo, I was signed off work last Friday for a week because I've been getting really bad headaches and migraines and I was kind of hoping that by now I would be feeling better. But I don't. The headaches have kind of calmed down but I now have a sore throat and a cough. Feeling so lethargic its unreal. I have so much crap to do and I just haven't got the energy at the moment. Ben's being pretty good. Although I would prefer it if he helped around the house more - without me asking him several times for his help and him then sighing and stropping with me. But hey.

On another point, I am soooooo pissed at my new flatmate. If you hadn't guessed, he is a tattoo artist and is currently tattooing several people a day out of my spare room. Which really annoys me. Not sure why it does so much, but it does. I guess that as he screwed my tattoo and my friends tattoo up I'm worried that he's going to fuck up someone else's and they will then go to the council who could fine us. But yeah, he spent all day tattooing some chick yesterday and he spilt some black ink on my brand new cream carpet. However, instead of trying to clear it up he looked at it and ignored it. It was only this morning, when I was rudely awoken at 6am by the sound of him re-arranging my kitchen, that I saw it and then proceeded to spend an hour on my hands and knees (with a migraine) scrubbing my carpet to TRY (and I really do mean try) and get rid of it. I've managed to get most of it up but you can still see a black spot on my nice carpet. 

And another thing, does he not know how to use the washing up liquid?? I am getting kind of miffed with doing his washing up as well as my own. Also, if he keeps using my cutlery and not washing it up I am gonna get soooo annoyed. I came into the kitchen this morning to find a sink full of my glasses, plates and cutlery even though I'd spent 20 mins washing all mine and my boyfriends things up before I went to bed. Grrrr. I said to Ben that I refused to wash B.D's (my flatmate) shit up. However I couldn't sit here with it all piled up on the side!! But I am going to try and ignore it from now on. 

Sorry for the wide range of colours. Figured I would try and add a bot of flare to my entries XD

Another quiz stolen...

Do you have a girlf​riend​/​boyfr​iend?​
I do indeed have a boyfriend

How many texts​ are in your inbox​?​
101

Who was the last perso​n you talke​d to?
My boyfriend

When was the last time you smile​d?​
A few minutes ago when Ben was tickling me and blowing raspberry's on my chest :/

What is somet​hing you reall​y want right​ now?
Burger King

How late did you stay up last night​ and why?
Erm... 1am cos I was waiting for Ben to turn SOMA off and come to bed

Who was the last perso​n you saw in perso​n?​
Ben, I'm looking at him right now XD

Are you pregn​ant?​
I bloody well hope not...

When is the next time you will hug someo​ne?
In a few mins when I go over to Ben and blow raspberry's on his cheek...

What are you eatin​g?​
Nothing, but I was made pancakes for breakfast 

First​ perso​n under​ S on your cell phone​?​
Sam - my brother in law

Are you more of a coffe​e or alcoh​ol drink​er?​
Erm... I drink both but very rarely. But I would tend to say that I usually end up consuming more alcohol then coffee

Did you have a good day yeste​rday?
Not really. I feel like crap :'(

Were you happy​ when you woke up today​?​
Not really seeing as I was rudely woken up at 6am by my rude flatmate banging around in the kitchen

Are you drift​ing away from someo​ne you were close​ with?
I have never really been close to anyone...

Is waiti​ng for someo​ne ever okay?​
Yes. I waited 3 years for Ben

Has someo​ne promi​sed you somet​hing and broke​ it?
Yes. Too many times!!


Who was the last perso​n to text you?
Marie


Are you happy​ with life right​ now?
It could be better, but it could also be worse

Who is the last perso​n you hugge​d and how old are they and how tall were they?
Ben, 22, and 6"2'

Last websi​te you went to was what?​
Twitter or Facebook, cant remember

Tea or coffe​e?​
Tea

Night​ or day?
Day

Die laugh​ing or sleep​ing?​
Laughing

Kfc or mcdon​alds?​
KFC. McDonalds makes me feel ill...

Whats​ the relat​ionsh​ip with you and the perso​n you last texte​d?​
Friends

When’​s the last time you cried​?​
Yesterday

Do you want kids?​
Yes, 2

Are you a coffe​e addic​t?​
Can't say I am no.

Would​ you kiss the last perso​n you kisse​d?​
God yes!!

Ever kisse​d someone whose name begin​s with D?
Don't think so, unless you count the peck on the cheek I give my dad (whose name begins with D)

Last place​ you trave​led to in a car?
Longleat. Ikea. Tesco's. Can't remember which one...

Is your hair up?
Yeah, it needs a wash tbh

Do you think​ you are an argum​entat​ive perso​n?​
Oh hell yeah!!

Is your phone​ right​ besid​e you?
Yes. Usually is...

Is the last perso​n you kisse​d mad at you?
Not at this precise moment in time...

How long does it take for you to fall aslee​p at night​?​
Freakin aaaaaages!!!

What color​ are your eyes?​
Bluey green. Depends on my mood

Are you a forgi​ving perso​n?​
Not in the slightest

How did you wake up this morning?
My flatmate made loads of noise in the kitchen


-thee end-

A survey that I stole off someone else's blog, hope she doesn't mind...

Here's a chance to see how well you really know your partner. Cut, paste and fill in the answers, then forward . . . shoot, you know what to do.

The real challenge is to send it to your other half to see if you are right!!

1.He's sitting in front of the TV, what is on the screen?
Most likely Pokemon

2.You're out to eat; what kind of dressing does he get on his salad?
Salad??? He doesn't eat salad

3.What's one food he doesn't like?
Pretty much all vegetables

4. You go out to eat and have a drink. What does he order?
Cider of some kind

5.Where did he go to high school?
Paignton Community College

6.What size shoe does he wear?
12/13

7.If he was to collect anything, what would it be?
Gadgets / Pokemon cards / Video games

8.What is his favorite type of sandwich?
Chicken and Stuffing, or Cheese, German Peppered Salami with some rocket and Reggae Reggae Sauce

9.What would this person eat every day if he could?
Probably cheese!

10.What is his favorite cereal?
He doesn't really eat cereal. But he like Rice Crispies

11.What would he never wear?
Haha, I don't know - dresses?? Nah, speedos!! Big no no for ANY guy XD

12.What is his favorite sports team?
Any skateboarding team I would say...

13.Who did he vote for?
Lib Dem's - Same as me

14.Who is his best friend?
I would say me but I doubt it. Not sure if he has any "best friends" Just a few close ones

15.What is something you do that he wishes you wouldn't do?
Apparently I'm too clingy. And I ask him to do too much. And I distract him too much when he's trying to revise.

16.What's his dream job?
Working in a lab somewhere

17.You bake him a cake for his birthday; what kind of cake?
chocolate

18. Did he play sports in high school?.
He was very good at athletics. And Frisbee. And he skated a lot.


19.What could he spend hours doing?
Playing video or computer games

20.What is one unique talent he has?
He can make me laugh even when I'm crying :)

A few ground rules to my new flatmate...

1. Don't EVER leave the front door unlocked 


2. If you insist on having the hallway light on every time you leave your room, at least freakin' turn it off when you go back into your own room. 


3. If you use our bowls, plates, glasses and cutlery WASH IT UP. Don't just dump it in the sink or leave it in your room. And if I go to your room asking if you have any of our washing up DON'T LIE TO ME and say you don't when I know full well you do! 


4. If you watch our TV, please ensure that the red record light isnt on as if it is, you will completely fuck up anything we are trying to record


5. Put your rubbish IN the bin. Not ON it or NEXT to it. And if there is no bag in the bin, PUT ONE IN IT

"Owwwww, I hit myself in the face..."

Ben and I have just spent the past hour or so watching things that we had recorded on Sky+. I love sitting next to him all cuddled up on our rather old and uncomfortable futon sofa thing. When our TV program had finished we sat there and talked and joked. I started to tickle him (even though he hates it) as I love the way he laughs and smiles when I do. Its a smile that I very rarely get unless I tickle him. But yeah, we were on the sofa and I was tickling him when all of a sudden he went "Owwwwww, I just hit myself in the face. It's all your fault" I cried with laughter. I love the way he does that though. He can come out with something that is completely random and, to anyone else, boring comments that I find absolutely hilarious!! I love the way he always makes me feel better when I'm down. He cuddles me and kisses my forehead. I adore him :) I love the way he's so dorky too. And the way he randomly tells me sciency things.

Just thought I'd share this little "Ben gem" with you.

xx

Some people have too much time on their hands....

My boyfriend is currently watching a video on the epic win blog. It's an insanely good video, but my god people have too much time on their hands!! Although to be fair, I could be classed as one of those people. However, I don't do anything even remotely constructive with my time. I just spend all my damn time on Facebook playing Cafe World, Restaurant City and Hotel City.

Its quite annoying actually, I had loooooads of things I wanted to write about that I thought of while I was lying in bed last night. Yet now that it comes to actually writing it all down I cant remember a damn thing!! :S

Oh well. Guess I should go get some food and hopefully I will remember some of the crap I thought you might find interesting XD

xx

Thought I'd give this whole blogging thing ago...

Sooooo, I've never done this before but thought I would give it ago as I've heard it can be quite therapeutic.

Guess I should probably introduce myself. I'm Kayleigh and I'm 22. I currently live in Bristol with my gorgeous boyfriend Ben.

I have to be honest, the only reason I got a blog was so that I can moan about things as I only have 140 characters on Twitter. Haha.

Currently watching Wizards Of Waverly Place on Sky. I've seen all them before but I find them quite funny and I'm waiting until my boyfriend, Ben, finishes work at 3am. Kinda missing him. I've been signed off work for a week because I keep getting migraines. The doctor gave me these awesome tablets that make me feel kinda floaty. Kind of worried though. I quite like the floaty feeling and find myself counting down to when I can take more of them. Lol.

We've recently had a guy move into our flat. Annoyingly, he's called Ben. Gets quite difficult when they are both in the same room. But anyways, I've decided that I don't like him. He blatantly lied to me before he moved in. He told me he was clean and tidy. He said he tattooed out of a shop in Cardiff 6 days a week and was at uni for 2 days a week. He said he had all his own things and wouldn't need to use any of ours.

However, he uses all our plates and bowls and then I have to wash them up as he just dumps them on the side. He leaves rubbish on my living room floor, even though I've just spent 2 days cleaning and tidying it all.

He illegally tattoos out of my spare room.

He is ALWAYS at home, sitting on his arse on our sofa.

He puts all his rubbish NEXT to the bin or on top of the bin rather then getting a new bag out and simply putting it in the bin.

We had the caretaker of our flat building banging on our door telling us to move the bike that he's left in the hallway. However, he just told him to fuck off. He keeps slamming the doors and leaving the light on. My boyfriend keeps telling me to stop complaining as it was my idea to let Ben move in. However, I only said yes to him as a favour for his now ex-girlfriend who is a friend of mine. They broke up a few weeks ago and he bought home some other chick today. He leaves in 4 months and then one of Ben's (my boyfriend) uni friends will be moving in. She's awesome! I cant wait for that. But yeah, he makes me feel really uncomfortable. I had quite a rough childhood. But I shall leave that story for another blog entry XD

I should probably go now. I doubt anyone will be reading any of these but I thought I'd write them anyway.

Bye for now!!

x